Sunday, May 26, 2024 – New York City

Date with 29yo Taiwanese FOB tourist

This girl was a professional dancer visiting from Taiwan for two months to take dance classes. I approached her in the park on Thursday. I had seen her with her red Jamaican-style braids sitting on a bench and told my wing Moses to approach, but he didn’t want to so I took it instead. She was down for an instadate then, but she wanted to go to some bar with live music so I went for the number instead because I didn’t feel like dealing with that and had the feeling she would come out for a date later.

Met up with her to grab boba. The hug was lukewarm and she immediately asked where we were going afterwards. I was getting “show me around tourist sightseeing” vibes so I called it out and told her we’re going to slow down today and be adventurous and spontaneous.

Headed to the park. She wasn’t that receptive to touch on the way. I really had the feeling that she saw this as a platonic date and I was thinking about how to change this or at least reveal it. I brought up Taiwanese vs. foreign guys and she said she didn’t have any experience with foreign guys. I was surprised as she travels a bunch. She said that she didn’t really meet anyone when traveling and when she did they “just want sex”. Oh boy, here we go.

I ran my typical routine: “When I was younger, I did a lot of hookups, but now I’m interested in the personality and the vibe, it makes the sex better.”

I asked if she’s more of a relationship type girl and she says she has only ever had relationships, never anything else. Remember, she’s 29 years old. Never even kissed someone outside of a relationship. Internally I was a bit shocked and thought the date was over at that point, but maintained composure and kept digging.

I leveled with her and gave her an ultimatum: “I’m worried that I don’t want to corrupt you. I’m pretty aggressive, pretty forward. I like you, but I don’t want to cross a boundary. I’m wondering if maybe we should end it and be friends.” Because of the language barrier, she wasn’t really able to respond to this. It was definitely putting a lot of pressure on her.

She finally was able to answer that in her past, she always had this view, and in all her travels, no one asked her out. I asked her what she thought about my intentions, and she said she wasn’t sure, but now she’s more sure. I told her: “I want to continue, but I don’t want to get to a point where we clash. If we continue hanging out, I’m going to kiss you, and I’m going to invite you home. I’m very direct because I don’t want to hurt your feelings later.” She continued laughing at each point nervously.

“I’m so nervous!” She laughed. I pulled her near and grabbed her hand. “Should we keep hanging out?” She was still ambivalent but leaning towards yes. Eventually she said “OK” and I assured her we would take it slow.

I changed topics and then invited her back to my apartment. I made sure to take everything very slow, with escalating touch. She got more and more comfortable with me. I checked in with her as we were cuddling on the couch: “How do you feel?” “More comfortable, now.”

Then I took her to the bedroom and gave her a first-time experience. She changed her whole trajectory just because one guy had the balls no one else did — to approach her in the park and offer her an adventure.

Even when she had met other guys in the past, they were too forward and didn’t get to understand her as a person. I read her blueprint and genuinely leveled with her, creating deeper connection through main character dialogue, something that has been a sticking point for me.

Afterwards, we showered together because it was humid and we were sweating. I’ve never done this with a girl in this apartment. I was a bit concerned she would get invested as she was acting very girlfriend-y after sex, but I was able to walk her to the subway.

Blueprint.